12:58 a.m. - 2014-02-21
&What If
&What if?:
What if I'm scared
What if I don't have time for a relationship
What if I never make time
What if I don't know that I want to make time
What if that stems back to the dysfunctional relationship of my past
What if I actually do want a relationship
What if I get shallow once it started
What if I lost focus because of a relationship
What if I let my dreams start to fail because of the influence of another human being
What if I never forgave myself for becoming content
What if I could find a good balance
What if I became happier and more productive than ever before
What if I was still free
What if he was free with me
What if I got held back
What if I was never, ever held back again
What happens if you never get back on the horse after getting bucked off
What if that's me metaphorically
What if I'm pushing people away
What if I don't know how to stop
What if I don't know what I want
What if I keep telling myself that I don't have to know what I want
What if I miss the right guy because I'm so busy not having time even though I probably have time but am making excuses because I'm scared of making a commitment and of everything falling to pieces and me falling to pieces or because I'm just scared of having emotions all together or opening up to someone while I'm unsure of whether they will accept me
What if I want to fix all these what ifs?
Love,
Rachel
